The rape was short and brutal. At least he let her live, thinking she hadn't seen his face. And they didn't catch him for almost a year, DNA evidence claiming yet another victory. But by then the baby had come, allowed to live by a woman who chose not to kill the baby for the sins of his father. A mixed race baby who was going to have a difficult life as an only child.

The police spoke to the woman, asking her if she wanted to go through the emotional battle of a trial or if the rapist could plead to a lesser offense. He would still get many years in prison, and as she thought it through, she realized her concern wasn't about what would happen to him, but how her son would go through the years alone.

In an act of "living sacrifice", she simply asked that they would obtain some more sperm from the offender and allow her to have another baby - one who could be a little brother or sister to her child. Same father, same mother, same color. Some sacrifice.

What does my "living sacrifice" look like?

I have a rocking head cold. I am sacrificing body fluids at an alarming rate. I sometimes wonder if being a living sacrifice should be something I am aware of as much as I am aware of my runny nose.

Not the part about wishing it wasn't there, but constantly aware of His presence and my connection to Him. Maybe that's gross, but I do wish I was that awakened to my commitment to Him.

I noticed yesterday some changes in my behavior when I am with my co-workers at a class we take together. I was checked several times from some of the sarcastic comments that I have been known for. It was rewarding to have those opportunities to sacrifice the amusement I would cause for the sense of knowing that I was listening more clearly to God.

I want to continue that progress, knowing that in His plan, I won't lose any of the true joy of life that I am capable of.

If this year-long quest is really about a renewed, transformed mind, then something has to change.

Change only comes as a result of dissatisfaction. (If I'm satisfied, why change?)

Dissatisfaction brings a willingness to sacrifice in order to find satisfaction.

Becoming a living sacrifice is my first step in bringing true satisfaction to my life. Trusting God to take my sacrifice and bring about the changes that will renew and transform me.

I will seek this day to understand what "living sacrifice" means in my life. Where is my dissatisfaction and what change is God planning for me?

"You do not delight in sacrifice, or I would give it. A broken and contrite heart You will not turn away."

David got to the heart of "living sacrifice" in this Psalm. The kind of open-heartedness God desires from us can only be found in offering ourselves as a living sacrifice.

Sometimes - too often, in my life - that open-heartedness only arrives from an incident of brokenness. I am choosing not to follow that road anymore. It is too difficult to try to cut my own path through life when He has already formed one for me and awaits my awareness of it.

Oddly enough, the path He has provided doesn't very often diverge that far from my own, it just avoids those things that trip me up and bring me down.

My heart must be continually offered up to Him as the only sacrifice He really wants. The other sacrificial stuff is character development - this offering leads to character deployment. My life, used regularly and fully for His will.

When I survey the wondrous cross
On which the Prince of Glory died,
My richest gain I count but loss
And pour contempt on all my pride!

This should not be sung with sadness, or pity, but with incredible admiration for the strength it took for Jesus to offer Himself as the sacrifice on our behalf! When I recite this verse with strength and power, it comes across in a whole new light.

To have that same attitude as a "living sacrifice" requires a realistic view of our "best" accomplishments and an awareness of how they rate in the eyes of eternity.

Any sacrifice I make is merely an opportunity to be like Jesus in that situation. He didn't seek His death, I shouldn't seek mine. He endured His sacrificial event - "for the joy set before Him" - I need to see what lies beyond my sacrifice and recognize the joy that exists and awaits me there. Then my acceptance of being a "living sacrifice" is not self-pitying, but strong and steadfast anticipation.